there are too many pictures of mermaids in sexy poses and not enough of them drowning and eating men. whats up with that
My parents are both pastors and once I was fucking this one dude who’s dad was the pastor of the rival church and he whispered ‘talk biblical to me’ so i started reciting Psalms 23 and we ended up getting into a competition of who could recite the most bible versus before they cummed
you need less jesus
if mermaids exist i hope they stay hidden because we’re just gonna end up killing them like we do everything else
If someone points at your black clothes and asks you whose funeral is it, a look around the room and a casual “haven’t decided yet” is always a good response.
"yours if you keep talking" sounds good